Cutting Room for August 8

The inexplicable success of the most nonsensical pop culture franchise in history continues. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was a big, fat stinkin’ hit, kowabunga-ing to more than $65 million opening weekend (way above projections). The disturbingly phallic shaped new incarnations proved immensely popular once more, and a sequel was greenlit yesterday. No word on if Megan Fox will return or if anyone cares if Megan Fox will return or if Megan Fox cares if anyone cares if Megan Fox will return.

If you’re a Roald Dahl purist and obsessive over how accurately his works are adapted to the big screen, get a hobby or something, man. Word is coming that Steven Spielberg’s upcoming adaptation of The BFG— which no one will convince me is an abbreviation that doesn’t include a specific “F” word—is deviating a bit. Instead of an orphanage, the main character will be at a fancy boarding school. And there will be several new characters, including scientists who don’t believe in giants. Actually, right now, there is an entire city (New York) full of people who don’t believe in The Giants.

Zack Snyder, director of Man of Steel and the upcoming (and ridiculously titled) Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, called in to a morning radio show in Detroit (where the latter movie is filming) to defend Aquaman. That’s a real thing that happened. He wouldn’t confirm that everyone’s favorite superhero punching bag and fish speaker was in the movie, but did say “he has the potential to be bad ass.” We live in a world where the director of a multimillion dollar blockbuster just defended a superhero that talks to fish on a radio program. I can’t tell if this makes me happy or sad.

I don’t know why there isn’t a Galaxy Quest 2. It’s such a great movie, and it still holds up! You know who else wants a sequel? Literally everyone involved from the first movie. Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver, Sam Rockwell, Justin Long, director Dean Parisot, producer Mark Johnson and writer Robert Gordon have all publicly declared their interest in doing a sequel. They’ve made five Step Up movies. I’m just saying. 

Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to film@thereader.com. Check out Ryan on Movieha!, a weekly half-hour movie podcast, catch him on the radio on CD 105.9 on Fridays at around 7:30 a.m. and on KVNO 90.7 at 8:30 a.m. on Fridays and follow him on Twitter.

posted at 06:51 pm
on Sunday, August 10th, 2014

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