No Crowning Achievement

Due Date

The filth wake of a new Jackass film makes other movies’ attempts to shock with ribald humor futile, even with dialogue like “I vomited in the wound.” Nice try, Due Date, but Steve-O practically gargled human feces. Too unimaginative to be risqué, director Todd Philips has made a “blender” film; you know, where they make an acceptable-but-not-delicious cinematic smoothie by pureeing...

entered on 11/10/10 at 11:28 AM | read more »



Is Our Children Learning?

Waiting for Superman

I pass tears like kidney stones. Big, fat crocodile drops aren’t easily milked from these tightly shuttered ducts. So when I tell you I bawled at Waiting For Superman — ugly bawled … in public — please know that means something. Writer/director Davis Guggenheim made a documentary about global warming, An Inconvenient Truth, the scariest movie of 2006; so it’s no surprise he made a...

entered on 11/03/10 at 10:06 AM | read more »


Lives for Sale

Never Let Me Go

In the special club of music video directors turned mainstream feature filmmakers, Mark Romanek is among the least visible. He hasn’t made a film since 2002’s creepy-but-minor Robin Williams vehicle One Hour Photo. Who would’ve thought, with only a handful of music videos made between then and now, that his latest feature, Never Let Me Go would be so good? A medical breakthrough in the...

entered on 11/03/10 at 09:49 AM | read more »



Slow Death

Hereafter

No matter how deserving it may be, there’s no way to feel good about panning a Clint Eastwood movie. The man is a force of nature: in just the last two years he directed and produced four films, composed the score for two more and starred in one. And he’s 80. His resume certainly demands respect; unfortunately his latest film, Hereafter, is a silly, sappy mess. Hereafter hops around the...

entered on 10/27/10 at 12:37 PM | Comments (1) read more »



Doctor in the House?

House

Calling a 30-some-year-old movie a “new release” feels strange, although we may all have to agree to redefine the word “strange” after seeing the ultra-bizarre 1977 flick House, directed by Nobuhiko Obayashi. The film’s lain in state for quite a while; but like any good zombie, reanimated just in time for our Halloween party, to drink too much jungle juice and do the “Monster Mash”...

entered on 10/27/10 at 12:34 PM | read more »



Gray-Haired Black Ops

Red

Wry sense of humor, sly sexuality, potent and visually stimulating violence? Oh, Ernest Borgnine, is there anything you can’t do? Okay, fine, although the 93-year-old gap-toothed thespian pops up infrequently in Red, a film for which all those previous descriptors do actually apply, his inclusion is a metaphor for the inexplicably kinda-awesome ha-ha/bang-bang extravaganza as a whole....

entered on 10/20/10 at 07:59 AM | read more »



Naval Gazing

Jack Goes Boating

It’s a little known non-fact that Philip Seymour Hoffman has had a role, big or small, in every movie ever made. If you don’t believe me, just look for his cameo as “cherubic South Carolina racist” in Birth of a Nation. We all knew it was just a matter of time before he applied his considerable talents behind the camera as well, as he did in his directorial debut Jack Goes Boating, an...

entered on 10/20/10 at 07:49 AM | read more »


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Ernest & Celestine

A kids movie for kids with kid jokes and kid themes.

GRADE
B+


Captain America: Winter Soldier

A kinetic crash of conspiracism and costumed crusaders!

GRADE
A-


Noah

Bible school by way of JRR Tolkien and Stephen King.

GRADE
A


The Grand Budapest Hotel

This madcap caper proves Anderson can do things (kinda) different!

GRADE
A


Need for Speed

If you're the "dumber" version of Fast and Furious, you lose.

GRADE
F


300: Rise of an Empire

A prequel, side-quel and sequel with the same style and carnage.

GRADE
B


The Wolf of Wall Street

DiCaprio crackles but the movie fizzles without taking a clear stance on Wall Street excess.

GRADE
B-


Stranger by the Lake

It's a Hitchcock thriller by way of Grindr.

GRADE
C+


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