Monday’s Daily Dump (1/18/11)

January is the cruelest month, no matter what Eliot said. Seriously, it's cold as blue balls out there, there's not enough football to keep us distracted, the movies largely suck, and there's no news of note really. It's a stupid, frosty month that only exists because my wife's birthday is in it. If it weren't for that, I'd have capped January in the face years ago. Let's take a look at the...

entered on 01/18/11 at 09:44 PM | read more »


Box Office Results for the weekend of January 14

There was a glitch in my HTML coding, which sounds like a nerdy way of saying I had diarrhea or something. But what really happened is that I forgot to slash or unslash inside a carrot and for some reason it ate all of my numbers associated with my predictions on Friday. Not that anybody NOTICED OR TOLD ME OR ANYTHING! Jeez, it's like a guy whose zipper was so unzipped you could see all of...

entered on 01/18/11 at 09:29 PM | read more »


Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions for January 14

Well, it's a big weekend. Oh, not for movies, those mostly suck right now. I'll be spending 100% of my energy trying to will my Chicago Bears not to blow ass against the inferior but dangerous Seattle Seahawks. Remember, Pete Caroll is a horrible person who feeds off the souls of children. Bear down, Chicago Bears! And I urge you if you are not FROM Seattle or married to Pete Caroll, I sure could...

entered on 01/14/11 at 11:53 PM | read more »


Ryan’s Junk Drawer for January 14

"With great junk, comes great responsibility" - Better Off Ted

It's probably been hard for you to stay focused at work today when you've been wondering when you're going to see my junk. It sneaks up on you sometimes, my junk. You'll just be working away and then, WHAMMO right on your computer screen is all of my junk. What if your boss catches you looking at my junk? Oh, hell, it's worth it,...

entered on 01/14/11 at 10:29 PM | read more »


Things You Should Buy Me (Volume 61)

Well, the holidays are officially over, as I'm back to receiving ZERO of the things that I am very clearly and articulately telling people to buy me. My wife actually had to call the help desk at ThinkGeek the other day. When I heard her give our last name, I thought: "Well, now she's about to get some respect, and I'm about to discover that they're waiting to send me a giant shipment of products...

entered on 01/13/11 at 11:08 PM | read more »


Wednesday’s Daily Dump

Hey blog fans, welcome back. Are you excited that I've chosen to hang on to "The Daily Dump?" No? But...but there's so many doody-related jokes that will be inspired by that decision. It's a brown treasure! It's a number one, number two decision! The jokes will just squirt out of me! See, this is a good time, isn't it? I am nothing if not classy. No, wait, it was crude. I'm nothing if not crude....

entered on 01/12/11 at 09:48 PM | read more »



I Beg to … Mostly Agree

Like the stereotypical Transylvanian numerologist on “Sesame Street,” I am transfixed by counting. Specifically, I am “Call Dr. Drew” addicted to top 10 lists. The best part is getting worked up; like “How dare that critic leave out the brilliant German relationship film Freudenschnitzel?” Sadly, this year most critics agree. Although I find deviations in my personal annual decalogue...

entered on 01/12/11 at 08:02 PM | Comments (1) read more »


Page 102 of 115 pages ‹ First  < 100 101 102 103 104 >  Last ›

Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1

Half of what promises to be an epic conclusion to a fabulous series.

GRADE
B+


Birdman

A delirously fun satirical send up of artistic pretension. 

GRADE
B+


The Overnighters

"The Grapes of Wrath" in documentary form set in North Dakota.

GRADE
A-


Interstellar

If this was humanity's last hope, give up.

GRADE
D


Nightcrawler

A condemnation of crime pornography with a chilling central character.

GRADE
A


John Wick

You kill his dog, he kills a million people. You've been warned.

GRADE
B


Dear White People

The type of smart, ballsy satire that comes along all too rarely.

GRADE
A


Fury

War is hell, but this movie is just hella slow.

GRADE
C+


The Burden of Actual Christianity

Most praise for writer/director Jesse Moss’s documentary, The Overnighters, has rightly been focused on its Steinbeckian...

more »


Awful, Not Full of Awe

Preposterous, pseudointellectual, poorly constructed, clichéd, impenetrably masculine, goofy and possessed of an...

more »


News-sploitation

Yesterday, CNN showed reporters physically chasing a woman connected to the Ebola scare. Not too long ago, a Fox News...

more »


Dogged Determination

John Wick killed three guys with a pencil.

John Wick is so good at killing, he had to bury his guns beneath a cement floor...

more »


Cutting Room for November 21

Movieha! Your favorite movie podcast

Cutting Room for November 14

Movieha! Your favorite movie podcast

Cutting Room for November 7

Movieha! Your favorite movie podcast

>