All the news I feel like printing for Monday

Not a whole lot happened over the weekend. I mean in terms of film. Plenty of interesting things happened in the world over the weekend, just not ones I get to make pithy jokes about here. I was going to go for some metaphor about how slow the weekend news was, but I couldn't choose between "slow" meaning stupid and "slow" meaning takes a long time. There is nothing worse than metaphor...

entered on 01/10/11 at 10:17 PM | read more »


Box Office Results 1/10

Fancy meetin' you here! I mean, it's not particularly FANCY...there are no doilies or fine china or anything. Makes you wonder why that expression is usually said like a cowboy. Did cowboys really refer to things as "fancy?" Curious.

Anyhoodle, I am excited to get to these haikus because I heard a great haiku this weekend at a poetry slam about Malcolm X, Warren Buffet, and how Omaha must have...

entered on 01/10/11 at 09:39 PM | read more »



Long Live the Dude

Omaha native and Emmy Award-winning documentarian Gail Levin profiles actor Jeff Bridges in a new film kicking off the 25th season of “American Masters,” a series produced for PBS by New York Public Media THIRTEEN in association with WNET. Levin, an Omaha Central High graduate long based in Manhattan, says the project has been on quick turnaround to parlay the heat surrounding Bridges. A...

entered on 01/10/11 at 08:09 PM | read more »


Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions - 1/7

Looks like I'm back in the haiku saddle again, ready to toss off some poetic verse whilst predicting the tallies and totals from what is sure to be a yawner of a weekend at the box office. Why do I say that? Oh, I don't know, do you think the lines for Country Strong or Season of the Witch will be long? Because those are your only new releases. Icky. Speaking of icky, here are my predictions!

...

entered on 01/07/11 at 06:19 PM | read more »


Ryan’s Junk Drawer For January 7

"With great junk, comes great responsibility" - Better Off Ted

I swear on my life I would post blogs more often if this new system didn't sporadically swallow them whole. I crafted for you a brilliant cornucopia of words. A hilarious, breathtaking, bouncy blend of verb and noun that was just totally gone when I tried to post it. Ever flush a chunk of your life straight down a toilet? Sigh. Now...

entered on 01/07/11 at 05:36 PM | read more »


Things You Should Buy Me (Volume 60)

Okay, you don't have to buy me anything this week. I accept that I have done nothing worthy of your free swag this week, in that I promised you no absences and then promptly took the next day off. In my defense: (A) - This new system is NOT as user friendly for quick posting, (2) - I am easily distracted, (C) - I probably deserve lots of gifts for all my hard work previous to this during which...

entered on 01/06/11 at 09:25 PM | read more »



Down on the Farm

White Material

French-born director Claire Denis grew up in Africa, and her latest film, White Material, is her first set on that continent since her 1988 debut Chocolat. Since ’88, Denis has become probably the greatest French filmmaker currently working, and White Material is an example of her observational, often dreamlike style at its peak.

Somewhere in Africa, a conflict between military forces and...

entered on 01/05/11 at 06:15 PM | read more »


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Dear White People

The type of smart, ballsy satire that comes along all too rarely.

GRADE
A



War is hell, but this movie is just hella slow.

GRADE


Dracula Untold

What if Dracula was a superhero?!

GRADE
C


Gone Girl

This thriller has many twists, the biggest of which is that it's kind of a satire.

GRADE
A


The Boxtrolls

A stop-motion romp with near-nekkid trolls and a cross-dressing villain.

GRADE
B-


The Skeleton Twins

A dramedy about suicide elevated by its stars.

GRADE
B


Frank

A band that has a lead singer with a fake head will win your heart.

GRADE
A-


The Adventures of Super Vlad

Left out of the superhero movie party every other studio is throwing, Universal made the ballsy decision to turn Dracula...

more »


Everyone is Awful

Warning to newly engaged couples: Do not see Gone Girl, a movie that makes marriage look like The Hunger Games with slightly...

more »


Swimming in the Laika

From Ray Harryhausen’s Medusa to Henry Selick’s Jack Skellington, stop-motion animation is just frickin’ cool, yo. Maybe...

more »


The Dies That Bind

“Hilarious!” say the trailers! “Really funny!” says the poster. “You are all sick people!” says me.

Yes, in parts, The...

more »


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