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Film

You Keep Using That Word…

 

Kim Jong-Uh Oh

 

Lewd, Rude Food, Dude

 

Mason, You Ignorant Slut

 

Syrek Sucks on Suicide Squad

 

Disneyfied and Simplified

 

Good Bad Guys or Bad Bad Guys?

 

Cutting Room for August

 

Omahollywood

 

Nun Too Soon

 

Unspecified Fashion Backward

The First Monday in May is a feature length-commercial for the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s world-famous annual fashion exhibition that quickly turns into a shockingly oblivious confirmation that every criticism we’ve ever heard about the fashion industry is absolutely, 100% correct. Director Andrew Rossi’s documentary is bookended by insufferable brownnosing that could only come from someone who’s used to begging...


The-huntsman-winters-war-official-trailer-00 Yas, Queens!

Oh dear God should The Huntsman: Winter’s War not work. Like, it should cause uncontrollable vomiting and permanent erectile dysfunction. So, sweet Jeebus, do I have my work cut out for me here. Nobody look at the score I gave at the bottom before reading all of this first, okay? Oh, come on! You looked. Just now. You looked just now, didn’t you? Dammit.

Fine, to recap: This movie is a sequel to Snow White and the...


Junglebooktriptych3-800x400 Beasts of Burden

The Jungle Book is director Jon Favreau’s “live-action”—if you count an entirely CGI environment with almost entirely CGI characters to be “live-action”—update of the classic Disney tale. A young boy, Mowgli (Neel Sethi) is protected by a panther, Bagheera (Ben Kingsley); semi-raised by a wolf, Raksha (Lupita Nyong’o); befriends a bear, Baloo (Bill Murray); kinda-almost-sorta gets eaten by a snake, Kaa (Scarlett...


Force awakens Awake My Soul

Nostalgia, like love, erodes rough edges; it fills in gaps, paints clean what was scuffed, and forgives copious small sins in the name of happiness. I’m sorry, but none of the Star Wars movies have been perfect. Although some are demonstrably (laughably) worse, all abound with fractures and flaws. That we deeply love (some of) them is a gentle affirmation of their use of the monomyth and a reflection of how they...


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