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Cutting Room for March 27

 

Unlucky Harms

 

Cutting Room for March 20

 

Mocku-Dracu-mentary

 

Don’t Watch Once

 

Awful, Not Full of Awe

 

Movieha! Podcast

 

Define “Run”

 

Ending in the Middle Earth

 

Cannesitfollows Sexually Transmitted Ignorance

Writer/director David Robert Mitchell’s It Follows is an alarmingly well-reviewed throwback horror movie that follows Jay Height (Maika Monroe), whose vagina gets cursed by Satan after she does it with her boyfriend. He straps her to a chair and explains she’s got poltergeist AIDS now because he had it and gave it to her. He says she’ll be followed by a shape-shifting monster thing that will slowly walk at her, and...


Furious-7 The Bacon of Blockbusters

Hands down, my favorite discussion in the wake of Furious 7 doing to the box office what Vin Diesel does to elocution (which is to say, stomping it to oblivion): “Do we really need another Fast and Furious movie?” No. No we do not. We also didn’t need to land on the moon. Nor did we need to create the 1967 Ford Mustang. We did it because it was awesome and we could, dammit.

Hail Fast and Furious, a franchise that...


31992  40133 zoom Movieha! Your favorite movie podcast

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Maxresdefault (2) Cutting Room for March 27

Much as the writers have given up on understanding the laws of physics, I have given up trying to understand what name to call each entry in the Fast and Furious series. Hell, I’m not even sure if there’s an ampersand up in that business or what kind of conjunction mojo they’ve got going on. What I DO know, is that Aksarben Cinema is where you want to be for the release of the seventh movie on Thursday, April 7 at 7...


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Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2

The worst thing that ever happened.

GRADE
F

It Follows

If you have sex, a demon monster will haunt you. That's just science.

GRADE
D

Furious 7

It's the 7th Fast and Furious movie. Do you need to know more?

GRADE
A-

Reader Recommends

'71

Set against the Northern Ireland conflict, this "trapped behind enemy lines" thriller delivers big time.

GRADE
A-

Reader Recommends

What We Do in the Shadows

A mocumentary about vampires that actually has teeth.

GRADE
A

Kill Me Three Times

Dueling assassins bore in this rip-off of Tarantino, who is himself a notorious ripper-offer...

GRADE
D

On DVD

Interstellar

If this was humanity's last hope, give up.

GRADE
D

Run All Night

Hey everybody, it's that one movie where Liam Neeson does the old man action thing...again...

GRADE
D

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