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Film

The Bacon of Blockbusters

 

Unlucky Harms

 

Mocku-Dracu-mentary

 

Don’t Watch Once

 

Awful, Not Full of Awe

 

Define “Run”

 

Ending in the Middle Earth

 

World’s Greatest Mom

 

Chap-Hazard

 

Leni Riefen-stalling

 

Simon pegg kriv stenders kill me three times Don’t Watch Once

Kill Me Three Times fails to be the Australian version of Pulp Fiction that director Kriv Stenders so clearly wants it to be. Besides the fact that’s a boring aspiration anyway, Stender’s new film never manages to emulate the energy of the classic Tarantino film. Everything feels routine: the three titled acts presented out of chronological order, the jarring shifts between humor and violence, the chronic...


Awful, Not Full of Awe

Preposterous, pseudointellectual, poorly constructed, clichéd, impenetrably masculine, goofy and possessed of an indecipherable ending, Interstellar is the mother of all misfires. It is a bloated juggernaut of stupidity, rolling its obese body stuffed with melodramatic subplots towards a conclusion that would have been laughed at had it been anyone other than writer/director Christopher Nolan who pitched it....


Run-all-night-joel-kinnaman-liam-neeson Define “Run”

At this point, there is just one Liam Neeson movie: Taken a Non-Stop Run All Night to Walk Among the Tombstones 3. Neeson isn’t in the midst of some Nicolas Cage supernova, in which an actor’s need to perpetually work and “get dat paper” creates an acting black hole more realistic than anything in Interstellar. It’s worse. Sadder somehow. Neeson is still trying, still making a genuine effort in each of these rote,...


Ending in the Middle Earth

There are many things I don’t understand: quantum mechanics, car commercials, who put the bomp in the bomb bah bomp bah bomp. But chief among the perplexing unsolvables to me remains how people who loved writer/director Peter Jackson’s Lord of the Rings trilogy don’t like the current Hobbit series. Better acted, more personal and possessed of better visuals and 100% more Evangeline Lilly, the only way in which this...


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Ex Machina

A brilliant bit of science fiction that works like a tense stage play.

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The Hunting Ground

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'71

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A mocumentary about vampires that actually has teeth.

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Kill Me Three Times

Dueling assassins bore in this rip-off of Tarantino, who is himself a notorious ripper-offer...

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