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Film

Wartcrap

 

That Boy Ain’t Right

 

Stuck in a Bunker With You?

 

Pop Culture, Popped

 

I Can’t Believe They Went Hare

 

Fun With Catholics and Communism

 

The 10 Best Movie Musicals Ever

 

Laughter Unshelled

 

Lady Sings the Blues

 

Mutant Fight Club

 

Par for the Corset

A quick preface before I eviscerate gifted director Joe Wright’s self-indulgent adaptation of genius playwright Tom Stoppard’s artifice-laden take on Leo Tolstoy’s classic Anna Karenina. I wrote a Master’s thesis on the influence 17th and 18th century female conduct books designed to codify feminine behavior had on the writing of Daniel Defoe’s satirical novel “Moll Flanders.” I don’t mention this just to make me...


Hawkes Virginity Hunt-ed

America’s Puritanical origins mean “sweetly sexual” may sound oxymoronic, but that phrase absolutely defines The Sessions, the softest and kindest movie to ever feature a star of “Mad About You” buck nekkid. Although nudity being “integral to the role” is a con that lecherous producers love to peddle to starlets drowning in Hollywood’s misogynistic subculture, this is a film legitimately predicated on preaching a...


Artificially Sweetened Pi

Forget Babe Ruth pointing a stick at bleachers; Life of Pi raises the stakes on “shot-calling” to unprecedented levels. Early on, it is explicitly stated that if the older version of Pi (Irrfan Khan) in the present day does not tell a story that convinces “The Writer” (Rafe Spall)—and by extension, the audience—in the existence of God, it’s a failure. No pressure or anything.

Considering that what follows is a...


A Man Did

A humble suggestion: Force the chittering, self-serving partisans in Washington who increasingly prefer filibusters over floor votes to watch Lincoln. Director Steven Spielberg’s latest provides a character sketch, not of its titular president, but of America’s political process. While hundreds of thousands of sons and fathers killed each other mere miles from where the House of Representatives screamed at one...


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Love and Friendship

An Austen adaptation that's a snoozefest, aside from two stinky performances...

GRADE
D

Independence Day: Resurgence

A bloated, unneeded sequel that's more chaos than cheesy fun.

GRADE
D

Central Intelligence

A buddy action movie where the buddies are put backseat to the "action." 

GRADE
B-

Finding Dory

A sequel to Finding Nemo that is pretty much exactly like Finding Nemo.

GRADE
B

Warcraft

An adaptation of a video game that will be enjoyed solely by people who loved that video game.

GRADE
F

On DVD

Midnight Special

A kid with weird powers is trying to get somewhere to do something that doesn't quite make sense.

GRADE
B-

Reader Recommends

On DVD

10 Cloverfield Lane

A "Twilight Zone" type tale about a man keeping captives in a bunker at the "end of the world."

GRADE
A-

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping

A pop culture skewering mocumentary most notable for raunchy songs you'll feel bad about singing...

GRADE
B+

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