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Film

Lewd, Rude Food, Dude

 

Mason, You Ignorant Slut

 

Syrek Sucks on Suicide Squad

 

Disneyfied and Simplified

 

Good Bad Guys or Bad Bad Guys?

 

Omahollywood

 

Nun Too Soon

 

Can Mew Dig It?

 

A Nice, Quiet Apocalypse

 

Still-Bourne Action

 

1% Happy, 99% Sad

Clate Blanchett, y’all. Cate friggin’ Blanchett. Day-yum!

Any review of Blue Jasmine that doesn’t start with a linguistic supplication of the otherworldly-talented actress doesn’t understand the magnitude of her performance. Shazam! Finding a drama centered around a woman who isn’t a stripper, hooker, murderer or murder victim is like stepping out back for a cuppa and seeing a prancing unicorn. It pole vaults...


But…Mud?

There are 161 reviews of Mud currently aggregated on Rotten Tomatoes. Of those, 98% are positive, meaning only 3 critics saw the same movie I did. Yes, writer/director Jeff Nichols made a purty movie with a strong cast and an interesting little allegorical fable. But do you know what the moral of that fable is? Love sucks because women are whores. I promise you, if you walk through the logic of what is shown, you...


A Bit Plain, Jane

Since Stephanie “Twilight” Meyers is a producer on Austenland, the following question is fair game: Why are readers who fangirl out about Mr. Darcy from Jane Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice” embraced or applauded while devotees of whatever-that-sparkly-vampire-dude’s-name-was are chided? Both of the male characters demonstrate icky behaviors that shouldn’t be desired in a mate, although admittedly the angst-ridden...


Yes Them Is

“What’s wrong with me?” My subconscious tries to smother this thought with a mental pillow, but the bastard won’t die.

Throughout the course of writer/director David Lowery’s Ain’t Them Bodies Saints—which most resembles a fictional ménage à trois between Beasts of the Southern Wild, The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford and your choice of Terrence Malick movie—I profusely self-loathed while...


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Don't Think Twice

A comedy about comedians, this is just barely entertaining enough!

GRADE
B-

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Kubo and the Two Strings

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Under the Sun

A stealth documentary about North Korea that's among the year's best.

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Sausage Party

Sentient food do really gross things in this potent satire.

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Life, Animated

This documentary follows an autistic man who uses Disney movies to find his voice.

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