Take the Psycho Path

Seven Psychopaths

With massive mainstream media marketing rollouts and the box office boons reaped by free social media, movies so rarely surprise us these days. Shock cameos are spoiled in the space of a tweet, while most trailers render buying the proverbial “movie cow” moot when you got the “third-act milk” for free in the preview.

Guess what? You’re so not ready for Seven Psychopaths.

And don’t worry...

entered on 10/20/12 at 06:06 AM | read more »



Object of My Affleck-tion

Argo

It’s easy to thrill people when they don’t know what’s coming. Okay, maybe not easy—paging Mr. Shyamalan—but certainly less difficult than whipping up tension in a film based on a decades-old actual incident, the resolution of which is but a Google search away. Between that and having to painstakingly recreate 1970s mustaches, actor/director Ben Affleck’s Argo faced several hairy problems. But...

entered on 10/14/12 at 06:20 PM | read more »



Margarine-al Humor

Butter

In the wake of a Presidential debate that was almost fact-free on one side and nearly lifeless on the other, smearing Butter on one’s eyes seemed like a good option for poll junkies. This allegedly politically charged ensemble comedy promised a send-up of campaign rhetoric, a no-holds-barred takedown of our no-holds-barred electoral system and a scantily-clad Olivia Wilde. One out of three...

entered on 10/05/12 at 09:20 PM | read more »



“Glee” Clubbed

Pitch Perfect

At the point where the fist pump from The Breakfast Club becomes a plot point, shortly after a near-mute Asian girl who ate her own twin in the womb makes snow angels in another girl’s vomit, Pitch Perfect moves from “cult classic” to “recommended for any human who likes funny.” Toss in the nonchalant itty-bitty beauty of Anna Kendrick, and it doesn’t matter how many cliches you overstuff this...

entered on 09/29/12 at 03:49 AM | read more »



R2D2 and the AARP

Robot & Frank

First things first: although she’s only eight years younger than him, nobody will accept that Susan Sarandon would want to kiss Frank Langella on his mouth parts. That premise requires a bigger suspension of disbelief than the rest of Robot & Frank, which presumes the world now has robotic versions of Mr. Belvedere.

Writer Christopher D. Ford and director Jake Schreier have composed a quiet...

entered on 09/28/12 at 06:40 PM | read more »



Circular Logic

Looper

Writer/director Rian Johnson is fantastic at making pretty good movies. 2005’s Brick was a slyly conceived yarn that took 1940s private dick dialogue and plot and affixed it to a modern high-school setting, with middling effect.  2008’s The Brothers Bloom was a nearly great con man movie without a great con anywhere in it. And now comes Looper, Johnson’s first foray into sci-fi and bigger...

entered on 09/28/12 at 04:25 PM | read more »



Brand Xenu Man

The Master

Writer/director/demigod of modern American cinema Paul Thomas Anderson—or PTA as his peeps call him—has a filmography so stunning that merely making a very good movie means it’s his worst one yet. So, with a heavy heart comes the news that The Master isn’t outright the best film of the year; it’s only one of the best films of the year. Step up your game, PTA.

What keeps this...

entered on 09/23/12 at 06:09 AM | read more »


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Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1

Half of what promises to be an epic conclusion to a fabulous series.

GRADE
B+


Birdman

A delirously fun satirical send up of artistic pretension. 

GRADE
B+


The Overnighters

"The Grapes of Wrath" in documentary form set in North Dakota.

GRADE
A-


Interstellar

If this was humanity's last hope, give up.

GRADE
D


Nightcrawler

A condemnation of crime pornography with a chilling central character.

GRADE
A


John Wick

You kill his dog, he kills a million people. You've been warned.

GRADE
B


Dear White People

The type of smart, ballsy satire that comes along all too rarely.

GRADE
A


Fury

War is hell, but this movie is just hella slow.

GRADE
C+


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