Once again, I’m back!

Did you miss me? I sure missed you, my devoted silent masses! I promised I would post a few times during my holiday (saying that makes me feel British..."I went on holiday" just sounds so much fancier than "I spent the majority of the last two weeks running errands and sleeping in"). Then I didn't. This isn't because I'm a lying liar. Okay, it's partially because I'm a lying liar. It's mostly because (A) I was CRAZY BUSY, busier than I was even during regular work time (weird), and because there wasn't that much going on. Movie news and info is so slow during those two weeks that it's almost all relegated to other critics' top 10 lists, weird news items (like the stunt guy who played Donatello in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies doing stand-up comedy...yes, I will post that video below), and other uninteresting blog padding. So my choices were to rest and come back stronger than ever, my eyes rejuvenated by having not stared into the electronic abyss for days and days, or to keep plugging away and find myself suckling the exhaust pipe of a Mitsubishi Galant before too long. I chose the former.

I thought about how to start this first post back, and one way seemed obvious.

But now what? Post the video everyone was passing around of the aforementioned stuntman who played Donatello doing mediocre comedy while wearing the mask? Okay.

Steven Ho: I was a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle from Steven Ho on Vimeo.

But NOW what? Recap the entirety of the events and rumors that took place in my absence? Okay, here you go:

That's a better view of one of the characters in Green Lantern. Thus, all we really know is that Green Lantern still looks turdier than your turdiest Christmas present. Seriously, other than ruining the cool cameo in Thor and minor casting news like, I shit you not, Samuel L Jackson casting news (I thought we collectively agreed not to encourage him to do every film ever by not covering his announcement that he'll be in every film ever), there is nothing of note to note. So, let's just kick off the new year with a deep, cleansing breath and vow to cover every bit of news, local and national, that warrants our actual attention.

Speaking of which, I am likely not going to continue a barrage of posts on the daily. Instead, I'm going to try to stick with one post (other than our cool columns like Things You Should Buy Me) every day that has the news of note that day. Why? Well, I think it's pretty unreasonable to assume that people will come back here repeatedly through out the day. Beyond that, it's pushing stuff that's cool off the page and whatnot. If someone has a giant objection (or wants to tell me that's a terrible decision for SEO purposes or whatever), I'll listen. But until then, for my sanity and your reading pleasure, I'm going to try to just hit you once a day. Sound groovy? It sure is good to be back, and I promise I won't disappear like that again for a long while. Feel free to comment with suggestions for the new year, news notes I may have missed, or whatever else your heart desires. We'll pick this up again tomorrow...deal?

Follow me on Twitter and a genie will grant you (no) wishes.


entered on 01/03/11 at 04:15 PM | read comments »


Cutting Room for December 29

  • Your Zen question of the day: When does being at the top make you feel like you’re at the bottom? Answer: When you are on TorrentFreak’s list of “Most Pirated Movies of 2010.” Guesses as to what the most frequently stolen movie was, clocking in at more than 16.5 million downloads? If you guessed the most recent Twilight movie, you think about pasty vampires too much. The answer is Avatar, which may have lost as much as $250 million in box office. That’s like stealing the food right from the mouths of James Cameron’s children’s real unicorn. Most notable was the second on the list, Kick-Ass, which was downloaded nearly 11.5 million times despite posting a global gross of less than $100 million. Thanks Internet for continuing to ruin the finances of others.

  • Like I’ve always said, if you can’t beat ’em, hope they get disqualified for arbitrary reasons. The best score of the year was either from The Social Network (by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross) or Black Swan (by Clint Mansell). Well, Reznor has an easier path to Oscar gold now (that’s a sentence I thought I’d never say), as Mansell’s score got tossed for being “diluted by the use of tracked themes or other pre-existing music.” He has good company though, as The Fighter, True Grit and The Kids Are All Right were all pitched from competition in a move to remind all of us how much the Academy often hates things that are good.

  • Warner Bros has discovered an additional 17 minutes of Stanley Kubrick’s 2001 in one of their seemingly infinite vaults. The footage was cut by Kubrick, so he didn’t want it in there. Still, if I can see another 17 minutes of monkeys, obelisks and starchildren, sign me up, yo.

Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address). Check out Ryan on the radio on CD 105.9 (Fridays at around 7:30 a.m.), on his blog at thereader.com/film/C19 and on Twitter (twitter.com/thereaderfilm).


entered on 12/29/10 at 03:04 AM | read comments »


Cutting Room for December 22

  • Inside a hollowed-out volcano, in a secret laboratory complete with Tesla coils and a mutated lackey, I’m working on my Top 10 list for the year. I take the whole thing way too seriously, as if there’s a studio executive with gun pressed to his temple murmuring “Please let us top Syrek’s list.” In a few weeks, we’ll see if that fictional man lives or if he Jackson Pollacks his drywall. For now, here’s how YOU voted, according to IMDB.com:

    10. Scott Pilgrim vs the World — 7.9/10
    9. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 — 7.9/10
    8. Shutter Island – 8/10
    7. Kick-Ass — 8/10
    6. Tangled — 8.1/10
    5. How to Train Your Dragon — 8.2/10
    4. The Social Network — 8.2/10
    3. Toy Story 3 — 8.7/10
    2. Black Swan — 8.9/10
    1. Inception — 9/10

    If nothing else, the top 4 proves the general public isn’t the drooling horde they’re often made out to be by some snooty critics. It also proves me whipping Igor here into a froth while seeking the formula to best identify my Top 10 is pointless. Thank God I don’t learn easily. BACK TO WORK, IGOR! CHOP, CHOP!

  • It only took decades for Hollywood to realize ladies like to laugh, too. Early buzz on Bridesmaids, the Judd Apatow-produced, Kristen Wiig-written comedy about feuding bridesmaids is off-the-charts positive. Although it doesn’t open until May 2011, look for studios to pee themselves when they finally realize they may have been undervaluing the comedic appetite of 51 percent of the population.

  • The Broadway musical version of Spider-man featuring music by U2 has been delayed … again. This is not helping my theory that I made the whole thing up while listening to the “Joshua Tree” in my Spidey underoos.

Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address). Check out Ryan on the radio on CD 105.9 (Fridays at around 7:30 a.m.), on his blog at thereader.com/film/C19 and on Twitter (twitter.com/thereaderfilm).


entered on 12/22/10 at 04:35 AM | read comments »


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The Skeleton Twins

A dramedy about suicide elevated by its stars.

GRADE
B


Frank

A band that has a lead singer with a fake head will win your heart.

GRADE
A-


The Trip to Italy

Another affable outing with two British comedians.

GRADE
B+


Sin City: A Dame to Kill For

Still a fun place to visit, provided you're not a woman.

GRADE
C


The Giver

This adaptation of Lois Lowry's beloved award-winning classic will be none of those things.

GRADE
D


Boyhood

The only coming-of-age story anyone ever needs to make. 

GRADE
A+


Guardians of the Galaxy

A gleeful space opera that is as visually stunning as it is hilarious.

GRADE
A


Fall? Oh, me!

I’ve reviewed movies professionally for more than a dozen years. The few weeks immediately surrounding the end of summer has...

more »


Bro-man Holiday

First things first: The Trip to Italy, the sequel to 2010’s surprise hit The Trip, may be the whitest movie ever made....

more »


Bleak and White

Celebrated narcissist and Freddy Krueger look-a-like Frank Miller gives the women he writes a plethora of career choices....

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Take It Back

Fail gloriously, if you must fail. Go down swinging for the fences, punchdrunk and confident you’re making something truly...

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