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Film

Report Card

Hereafter = D- Nobody tell Clint Eastwood his movie about death sucks. It may kill him. Red = B AARP-sponsored carnage, with added Malkovich. Never Let Me Go = A Does watching a movie about how depressing it is that life is so short count as irony? ON DVD Scott Pilgrim vs the World = B+ Whoa, these hipsters know kung fu! Secretariat = F If the dialogue doesn’t kill you, you’ll kill yourself. Worst of the...


Report Card for October 21, 2010

Easy A = A- Emma Stone more than makes the grade … she makes me swoon. •(READER RECOMMENDS ON DVD) Human Centipedee = B- Just the plot makes me queasy. Look it up for yourself…but don’t do it at work. •Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole = C+ Hey kids, want to fear death by bird? •Secretariat = F If the dialogue doesn’t kill you, you’ll kill yourself. Worst of the year. •The Social Network...


Poke of Genius

The Social Network shows smarties suck Whether owed to a ritual goat sacrifice or a cauldron-cooked potion, mastery of the dark arts is the only way Aaron Sorkin’s script about an insufferable prick compelled by hubris and hormones to create a website out of spite could sizzle like an unpoked hotdog in the microwave. Although The Social Network is surfing atop a hyperbole tsunami that’s included Citizen Kane...


 

X-Men: Apocalypse

A nonstop mutant fight club with little plot, thin characters and a whole lotta fun!

GRADE
B

Reader Recommends

The Nice Guys

The pulp noir gleeful misadventures of two jerks who unravel a conspiracy involving porn and climate change in the 1970s.

GRADE
A-

Louder Than Bombs

A bunch of stereotypical quasi-characters brood and pout, if you like such things...

GRADE
D-

Sing Street

A pleasant 1980s-set coming-of-age music-based movie that is a little cliched but still fun.

GRADE
B

On DVD

The Witch

A boring "horror" movie in which the scariest thing is the hygeine of American pilgrims. 

GRADE
F

Francofonia

An uncomplicated but visually experimental documentary simplistically arguing: "Museums good."

GRADE
B

Embrace the Serpent

A routine "Heart of Darkness" story that's something special.

GRADE
A

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