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Film

Report Card

Hereafter = D- Nobody tell Clint Eastwood his movie about death sucks. It may kill him. Red = B AARP-sponsored carnage, with added Malkovich. Never Let Me Go = A Does watching a movie about how depressing it is that life is so short count as irony? ON DVD Scott Pilgrim vs the World = B+ Whoa, these hipsters know kung fu! Secretariat = F If the dialogue doesn’t kill you, you’ll kill yourself. Worst of the...


Report Card for October 21, 2010

Easy A = A- Emma Stone more than makes the grade … she makes me swoon. •(READER RECOMMENDS ON DVD) Human Centipedee = B- Just the plot makes me queasy. Look it up for yourself…but don’t do it at work. •Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole = C+ Hey kids, want to fear death by bird? •Secretariat = F If the dialogue doesn’t kill you, you’ll kill yourself. Worst of the year. •The Social Network...


Poke of Genius

The Social Network shows smarties suck Whether owed to a ritual goat sacrifice or a cauldron-cooked potion, mastery of the dark arts is the only way Aaron Sorkin’s script about an insufferable prick compelled by hubris and hormones to create a website out of spite could sizzle like an unpoked hotdog in the microwave. Although The Social Network is surfing atop a hyperbole tsunami that’s included Citizen Kane...


 

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Set against the Northern Ireland conflict, this "trapped behind enemy lines" thriller delivers big time.

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A-

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What We Do in the Shadows

A mocumentary about vampires that actually has teeth.

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Kill Me Three Times

Dueling assassins bore in this rip-off of Tarantino, who is himself a notorious ripper-offer...

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On DVD

Interstellar

If this was humanity's last hope, give up.

GRADE
D

Run All Night

Hey everybody, it's that one movie where Liam Neeson does the old man action thing...again...

GRADE
D

On DVD:

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies

The epic conclusion to the most epic of epics.

GRADE
A-

Mommy

Writer/director Xavier Dolan's latest is an electric emotional epic.

GRADE
A+

Chappie

A cliched Robocop riff stuffed with an insane South African rave-rap band.

GRADE
C

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